If you have asserted yourself and made it clear to another person that he or she is not respecting your boundaries, it is okay to ignore correspondence from that point forward. Usually, it's incredibly difficult to change as a person, but not impossible.
Remind yourself of your own worth, and that no one has the right to make you feel uncomfortable or take your self-defined space away from you. Find a person who won't get mad at you, and they're asking for something small, try it out. Its so hard at first, but I can't even remember the first time I said no! I suggest starting small and in a non-threatening way (I mean non-threatening in reference to yourself, your value system, and your general modus operandi).
Madeline always prided herself in being "a nice girl." As a child, she was taught that being kind to others was a virtue; she grew up paying special attention to the positive feedback she received for being nice and pleasing others.
She derived much of her self-worth from putting the feelings and needs of other people well above her own.
A dictionary definition of intimacy talks about close friendship, deep emotional connection, and sexual involvement.
To be intimate with someone is to be close to him or her, to reveal private information, to feel linked together.
So start small with something manageable and build up your assertive skill to larger tasks like these: 3. When you first start acting assertively, if it is a departure from your habitual state, you may be afraid that others will perceive you as mean or rude.Madeline knew it was time for a change—she needed stronger boundaries.Boundaries can be defined as the limits we set with other people, which indicate what we find acceptable and unacceptable in their behavior towards us.Suggest a way they can do it themselves ("perhaps you can try finishing your project over the weekend").Remember, it's better to say no, suffer a bit of guilt, and then feel free and happy than to say yes, and feel resentful towards the person asking you to say 'yes'.At 31, Madeline could not understand why her co-workers dumped extra work on her; why her family constantly intruded on her personal space; and why men who she had dated years ago continued trying to be part of her life, even after she told them she had started seeing someone else.