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Donald Trump: Heya Sloppy Steve, am I going to have to fire you a second time?

We have a cozy date coming up in Helsinki this month. How about a little pressure to get our Iranian friends out of Syria? That’s like asking about my other assignations on our first real date. But that Pompeo and Bolton: they just want to strip away everything we got and screw us! Steve Bannon: A plea to go slow with Dictator Number Two. Mohammed bin Salman: I am fickle, just like you, Mr. But please don’t focus on what’s going on behind closed doors in my country.

▼ Looking at the Steam page, the game’s genres are “cute,” “anime,” “visual novel,” and…

▼ And then just like that, the warnings disappear, and the bright, colorful, happy title screen appears complete with cute animations and background music!

Oh God, so it’s going to be some weird fetish game? She convinces you to join the literature club, since you’re a slacker and don’t do any extracurriculars.

I was confused but intrigued at that point, so I clicked “new game.” It starts off like an incredibly generic visual novel: you’re a bland male protagonist with a super-cute girl living next door named Sayori who is always excited, crazy about you, and of course late for school.

It’s got to be a staged, mutual process, with a peace treaty to end the Korean War and real security assurances. I need to know where you stand, Mb S, before I can really get into bed with you.

But I’m worrying now that you’re getting cold feet. Kim Jong Un: You showed me a good time in Singapore, Mr. But then you sent your emissaries to my capital and they tried to twist my arm. I was very clear about what you need to give me for this relationship to work out. Steve Bannon: Should we be expecting yet another lawsuit from a wronged woman?

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He has a French accent and repeatedly says “I do not push, I do not shove, I am as sweet (sweet is said in a high pitched voice) as a turtle dove, I get my looks from the man above, my name’s Amore, my name means love.”In the past we've borrowed a male and female senior leader from our rival high school and had them serve as our guest 'bachelor' and 'bachelorette' for the night.

▼ …but then occasionally they drop a few odd lines here and there that make you stop for a moment.

4 girls (one from each grade) competed to win the date with the bachelor.

Steve Bannon: Now let me tell you about the fantastic package we have for you two besties.

Donald Trump: See, some of my best friends are Muslims!

Donald Trump: Dictator Number Two, we got it in on in Singapore. Our past contestants, including all your recent predecessors, have insisted that we include a democrat or two in the mix even if they bed down with their favorite dictator at the end of the show.

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